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I watched one interview with the UK criminologist. Will leave a link below. He helped me to realise and remember, that people who kill are wanting power and control. Domination and authority.

I was thinking, where does it come from? Paul Gilbert’s book about compassion reminded me, that our old – primal brain are focused on threats. During threats our brain goes to flight, freeze or fight modes.

Having power and control comes from feeling unsafe and threatened. That is a fight mode of our old-primal brain where survival was the most important thing. It still is, however, now we are tapping into our new brain, where compassion can help us to not go back into threats system, but opposite, learn to deal with it.

I never thought about it this way, that people who need to control and dominate do this because they are feeling unsafe, unloved, disrespected, shamed and list goes on.

However, being obsessed with power and control turns into an abusive behaviour, which then makes victims suffer or some people fight back and cause even more abuse. It circles around like a wasp.

What can be done to make people feel safer?

Education from childhood. I think our education system is nonsense. It doesn’t teach anything about psychology or philosophy, it doesn’t teach how to cope with things in life, it doesn’t teach to seek help when you are in danger. Children are one of the most vulnerable in our society, however, there is little done to make them feel safe and provide them a good environment to grow.

Therefore, our primal – threat based brain system is always above and always in control, because children who grow up in abusive environment only learn how to survive, but not how to thrive.