My inspiration flew away during quarantine. So I asked people to suggest some themes for me on the Instagram. And here is the first one – feelings, or how to control your emotions when you can’t. This theme is always important. Especially now, while we are closed between four walls. Anyway, we all have the feelings and we have different reactions. Sometimes we are Volcanoes and sometimes tornadoes. Usually, we get irritated when somebody else gives their anger to us. For example, family, friends, partner, colleagues, workers in the shops and even random people on the bus.

You can’t even imagine how many people talked with me on the bus. They don’t care where you will get out or when, they just talk. I love talking with people so they don’t get me anxious. Also, you can always hear some interesting stories. But for somebody else it can provoke anger, displeasure and other negative emotions. One would say – what on earth this person wants from me? That is normal as we are emotional human beings. We all have things happening behind the scenes. Feeling emotions is all right. But how to control them?

Some say that people who live in the imbalance are the ones who can’t control their behavior. Maybe they have some problems with family members, friends or a partner.

It’s not difficult to control emotions for me. Although, close people can clearly read my face expression and understand what I feel. Recently, I had trouble to control my thoughts and my behavior. I can’t hide sadness, anger and joy. It feels like a radiate all those emotions. I am in distress.

After meeting one Lama I heard him saying that when we are happy and something bad happens we react to it more than we usually would. So, when have neutral emotion our disappointment is smaller. While we are sad small things makes us happy. So, as much as we can we should react neutrally to the events. Same with negative emotions, they bring us stress and later one illnessses. It is very hard to control yourself. I tried to act like this. When I got a ten from my study object or when I participated somewhere that made me happy I just didn’t make a big deal out of it. I just said to myself: “okay, this time you’ve done good. I am happy because I did what I could with my opportunities. Now – move on”. More precisely – don’t sleep on your medals. Same don’t get used to a victim role. Because it is easy to see problems everywhere. It can draw in you quickly.

Life is the way it is. Sometimes you will get something unbelievably beautiful and sometimes something horrible. No other way. If you want to react less, control yourself. Find a thing which helps you to relax. Somewhere I read or heard that we live in a reactive world. For example, Facebook. You can react to everything: posts, photos, videos and comments. We react, but we don’t think why we react like this. Because reaction is subjective. I’ll definitely be better to everyone if I am happy. I don’t notice other people small mistakes while I am in the good mood. But how do we react when we are angry? Oh dear, we get mad even if someone says something or looks at us not the way we like that day. Right?

You need to remember, the more neutral we stay, the more our surrounding will stay calm. But as you may know when we are happy we get some hormones so it is difficult even physically to stay calm. Don’t forget neutral doesn’t mean absence of emotions. Just every emotion should be accepted with a bit of coldness. We don’t let the emotion take roots in us.

Sometimes to pour out the feelings is also good. I personally have to cry twice a month. Even when I’m happy you can find me crying. That is how my emotions goes out. For example, others do sports, art or drink alcohol. Everyone has their own way to deal with emotions. But when it is bad? When person has to spill out their feelings almost everyday. This means imbalance.

So, what is the best decision I really don’t know. But you always can get help from specialist who’s work is to help with personal problems.

And here a few links, I think might be helpful. 😉

Also, if you have some interesting themes – write me! Or follow me on Instagram. ❤

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201502/5-ways-get-your-unwanted-emotions-under-control

How to increase control over negative emotions through emotion regulation

The Ultimate List of Emotions and How to Control Your Emotions